It’s been a while since I posted about how I am getting on with my organiser, who I called Astrid. But it’s not because I have stopped using it every day, on the contrary, Astrid is my daily companion! Admittedly, most days, it houses my to-do lists, but having my addresses, notes, and plans for the coming weeks all in the same place is very useful, and I think this may well be the first time ever that I have started a diary in January and am still using it in April.
I used to keep a journal-style diary when I was younger. At first, it was just an occasional thing, when I wanted to rant about something or express my feelings when I was upset. Then in 1999, my sister gave me a ‘last year of the millenium’ diary, which had a metal cover, and the idea was to write something every day. And I did. Then the following year, I got another one, this time, a whole page for each day. And for several years, I wrote a journal entry every single day.
I have all of these notebooks and diaries tucked away in the loft, and I have no idea what I will do with them, maybe one day I will put them in a pile and burn them, or perhaps I will go through them and see if there is anything useful or funny, who knows, maybe they’ll even inspire a series of blog posts.
The funny thing is, I would always write in my diary when I felt upset or down, but as soon as I got happy, I stopped writing diaries. I was too busy being in the moment of happiness to write my thoughts and feelings down. So some of the happiest moments of my life have gone completely unrecorded, and yet some of the most painful moments of my life will live forever through my written words.
It’s probably because writing has always been my form of therapy. But it makes me a little sad to think that I can more easily recall the bad times than the good. And it makes me a little more determined to change that, and also to release the old stuff.
This little rambling reminds me of a scene in The Elphite, where Ellie is encouraged to burn her diary, which contains all her many memories, in order for her to release her past and create a new future. I think perhaps having a bonfire may be a good idea after all!
Please do comment below if you write diaries, and if you think it’s a good idea to burn old ones in order to create a better future, I’d love to hear your thoughts.