hoarding | Twin Flame Blog

This week I have been moving the contents of my print studio into a storage unit. In doing so, I realised that I have not had all my belongings in one place since 2008.

That was when I moved to New York. I got rid of much, putting only the stuff I couldn’t sell or bear to part with in my mums loft. Since then I have moved dozens (yes, dozens) of times, with my belongings spread through homes, storage units, studios and lofts.

For a while, I managed to keep my stuff to a minimum. Once, I even moved to Cornwall in just my tiny Micra! But once I started knitting again (thank you, Outlander!) And then handsewing, and then printing, well, the stuff kind of exploded.

I would say it is near impossible to be a multi-hyphenated creative and be a minimalist.

I’ve had many dreams in my life, many of which I have realised (see previous post) but I think my biggest dream now is to live in a place where I belong, with all my belongings.

Maybe then I could sort them properly, get rid of what I don’t need, appreciate the things I love, and use the materials I have (I know, ridiculous idea).

It’s only in the last few years that I’ve realised the link between ADHD and hoarding, and I genuinely don’t want to end up in a hovel filled to the brim with junk*, but I also don’t want to live in this fragmented nomadic way either.

Crossing everything and hoping that the next time I move, I will be able to reunite all my stuff, and live a more wholesome existence.

The rather stunning view on the way to my storage unit

*I honestly don’t want to end up like the old lady in The Magical Dragon Mirror, but if I ended up with a portal to the dragon world in my hallway, that would be pretty cool!

I’m in a slightly ranty mood, so take from this post what you will!

I have stuff. And I like all of it. I’m not a hoarder in the sense that I keep absolute rubbish, but I do get sentimental about things. I come from a family of hoarders, so in my defence, I never had a chance.

I get that energetically, it’s better to have less ‘stuff’. To have a clear space is to have a clear mind, and I have to say, every time I watch a decluttering program (I do love Marie Kondo!) I have the urge to clean, tidy and purge my stuff. And some things have improved – my drawers contain all Konmari style folded clothes now, and have done for months. But some things don’t change.

And one of those things is, I like my stuff.

I’m not just a writer. Or even just a reader. I have a LOT of interests and hobbies. I knit, crochet, scrapbook, sew and create all sorts of crafty things. I love stationery (washitape is my current addiction) so I have a lot of papers, pens, stickers, notebooks etc. I run my own business, so I have stock, packaging, and equipment like lighting etc for filming videos.

And you might be reading this, thinking – so what? Why is this an issue? Well, the issue is, I don’t own my own home, and in the last 12 years, the longest I have stayed anywhere is my current home for the last 13 months. So I have moved, a LOT, and every time, I get so many comments from people on just how much stuff I have. Yet I bet any of them would struggle to move their belongings every few months!

I honestly do wish I could be minimalist, and believe me, I have done energetic work on having too much stuff. But the things is, I love the things I own. In the words of Marie Kondo – they bring me joy.

What doesn’t bring me joy is having to pack them up and move them all the time! So of course, the easy solution is to have a permanent home. But unless a magical unicorn that poops gold bars drops out of the sky right now, that’s not really an option.

There’s not really a point to this post, I was just feeling ranty because many minimalist people seem so smug about not having so much stuff, and to be honest – if I were minimalist, I’d probably be smug too. It does seem like an easier way of life!

But until I find the magical minimalist pill, or a gold bar pooping unicorn, I guess I better just get used to packing a lot of boxes…