When we go through painful situations, we often will do anything not to feel the pain. Not to experience the hurt. Not to feel the embarrassment, sadness, grief, anger etc. So we block it out. With alcohol, or Facebook, or books or movies or actually running away to somewhere else.
When we desperately want something or someone who we know is toxic for us, whether it’s a person or a cigarette, we find that we don’t have the will power to stop ourselves from picking up the phone or the lighter, because we can’t bear to feel what we are feeling. We can’t bear to crave something. We can’t bear to miss someone. We can’t bear the longing and the heartbreak and the desperation.
But what if we just felt it? What if we just dove into those feelings and really allowed them to be? Perhaps we would break the addiction. Break the cycle. And release the feelings.
It’s hard to do that when we have spent so many years avoiding it. But it’s time. Time to stop running away from our feelings and running towards the drama; instead go deeply into the feelings and feel them, acknowledge them, accept them.
Once you have done that, you can move on. You will no longer be running away. You will be moving toward your joy. Toward things that are healthy. Towards your dreams.
Of course, I’m not saying to stop using Facebook, or watching movies or reading books. But I am saying that when you do those things, do them because you enjoy them. Not because you’re using them to escape your feelings.
You might find that the feelings you’ve been avoiding really aren’t the monsters you’ve made them out to be.
Sending you love, you are strong. You are beautiful. You can create a life that you don’t need to escape from. I believe in you.