I am participating in the Smashwords event – Read an E-Book Week, which starts tomorrow. I only have three of my books on Smashwords at the moment, so from tomorrow you can get a free copy of Choose Your Own Reality or Heaven Dot Com, and you can get a copy of The Doorway to PAM for just 99cents.
If you are an Indie Author, log in to Smashwords to take part, it should be fun 🙂 And readers – visit Smashwords tomorrow to view the list of free and discounted books that will be on offer!
Then be sure to have plenty of aloe vera for when you get burned.
A Twin Flame relationship is like no other union on earth. When in the presence of your Flame you are your true self, you are complete and whole and most of all you are home. Many Earth Angels have a strong longing for their home, whether it’s the Angelic Realm or another planet, but when they are with their Twin Flame, that feeling of not belonging on earth, of being different, or alien on this planet, disappears. And they have found where they belong.
But as harmonious and beautiful and breathtaking as a Twin Flame union is, within the beauty and joy is a darkness. As with everything, there is a duality. It is not all fireworks and fun, and often, when you hold onto your Flame too tightly, like a firework held tightly in your fist, you will get burned. Flames must be free to dance and move around, free to be their own unique selves, while coming together at times too.
Why am I saying this? Mainly it’s because of a song lyric in a popular song that I really like at the moment – Bonfire Heart by James Blunt. The lyric in particular is the following:
Everybody wants a flame, but they don’t want to get burnt.
[youtube http://youtu.be/g1j1qwQQ8-Q]
But unfortunately, in my experience, that’s just not possible. Because though Twin Flames love each other unconditionally, we are humans, in physical bodies, on a physical plane, and it is not always possible to live purely in the metaphysical realm of pure, unconditional love. We have emotions, we have baggage from past relationships, maybe even from past lives when we were together and then lost each other. We have beliefs and ideas we have been brought up with. We are human now, even if we weren’t previously. And we are here to experience everything. The good, the bad, the painful and the joyful.
The difference between the bad times in a Twin Flame relationship and the bad times in any other relationship, is that no matter what, Flames loves each other and want the best for each other, and would never intentionally harm one another. Disagreements and arguments are more likely to be about human baggage, and if both Flames are aware enough, can be discussed and resolved without needing to resort to separation.
I was asked today how it is possible to be with your Flame, and know it for certain, but have your Flame be completely oblivious to the fact. I personally think it comes down to fear. There is an amazing description in a book called ‘Only Love is Real’ by Brian Weiss. The book is about soulmates, Flames, who find each other through different lifetimes. Weiss is a very well-known hypnotist and has written several books on past lives. The first couple of pages of the book was the most poignant to me, and you can read it on the look inside feature on Amazon. I would recommend buying the book and reading the whole thing though, as it demonstrates just how incredible it is that we are able to find our Flames in this age.
As much as the burns can be painful, please do not let the fear of the stinging pain put you off of finding your Flame, or from being reunited, if you already know them. Burns do heal, and the faint scars left behind are just reminders that you were brave enough to allow yourself to be vulnerable, and to love wholly and absolutely. I know that no matter how many scars I may have, I will always be thankful for every moment spent in the arms of my Flame.
In January, I met an amazing individual called George Hardwick. I had gone to London for a couple of events, and he was at the first one, which was the Yes Group London meeting. Attracted by the cover of his book, I began talking to him about living life as a creative. He is a spoken-word artist, and one of the first things he’s said to me, was:
“To be successful in your creative missions, you must be world-class in whatever it is you do.”
Now at first, I thought, well jeez, that’s a bit of a tall-order! There are millions of writers in the world, and even if I tried my hardest, I couldn’t imagine being known as a world-class author. It just seemed impossible. I bought his book, The Creative Uprising, because I was intrigued by his message and his ideas, and wanted to know more.
Then at the end of the evening, after listening to two incredible speakers, who indeed both appeared to be world-class in what they did, George took to the stage.
To say I was blown away would be an understatement. He delivered a rap/poem, that encompassed the messages of the two speakers, and the energy of the meeting, and it flowed and rhymed and made us all laugh, gasp and clap. And he had written the entire thing during that evening, while sitting and watching in the audience. He had taken in every word, and then wrote the piece, which summarised the evening in the most poetic and beautiful way.
He was, quite frankly, world-class.
In fact, you can see his ‘wRapping up’ of that evening below. Even if you weren’t there and watched the speakers, you will still get a lot from George’s words.
[youtube http://youtu.be/2BRlg89vuj8]So how can you become a world-class success? Recently I have been re-reading two books, the first is The Go-Giver, by Bob Burg and John David Mann, and the second is Go-Givers Sell More, by the same authors. The first is a parable, and the second then applies the laws from the story to real life. For anyone who has a phobia of selling, I would highly recommend them. There are five laws described, and the first is the Law of Value, where your true worth is based on how much value you create for others. As they say in the second book, creating value for others does not necessarily need to cost any money. You create value every time you take the time to thank someone, greet someone or call someone to say hello. In business, you create value when you send a handwritten thank you note or in fact do anything where you are putting the needs and desires of your customer above your own.
This is what I think it means to be world-class. George says in his book that we often link success to how much money or stuff we have acquired, but that it doesn’t necessarily mean anything. And that it is more important to be successful in helping others and changing people’s lives for the better, by giving our gift. A while back, fed up with being asked how many books I had sold, because to most people, that is how you measure the success of an author, I wrote the following quote on my Facebook wall:
“Do not ask an author how many books she has sold. Instead, ask her how many lives she has touched.”
To me, I write to help people. I don’t write to see how much money I can make, because that is not how I measure success. The main reason I would like to sell more books, is so that I can help more people. And I am coming to realise that I need to step up my game. I know that I have published books before they are ready, and I have not given my all to making sure they are as awesome as I can make them before I release them into the world. This is due to impatience and an attitude of ‘It will do’. But no more. I will still set myself deadlines, because I know full well that without them, I will never publish anything, but I am making a commitment to myself that my next book is as amazing as I can possibly make it before I publish it.
Oddly enough, when it comes to projects I do for other people, I will work my ass off to make sure it’s as perfect as possible, before the author publishes it. It seems I have no problems with working really hard for other people on their projects, but when it comes to my own, I am more slack. I suppose I fear disappointing others more than I fear disappointing myself, but I need to change that feeling into the driving desire to be world-class in every sense.
As the saying goes – ‘How you do anything is how you do everything.’ And I am beginning to think that in order to be successful in life, and not just in our creative missions or business, we must be world-class in EVERYTHING that we do, every day.
What do you think?
P.S. After having a conversation with Bob Burg on Twitter, I would like to add to this post that it isn’t a case of EITHER creating value for others OR making money, it is more of a case that by putting your FOCUS on creating value for others, then making money will be the result. I know I have had difficulty with the idea of being paid to help others or for doing something I love, but I am working on those old beliefs.
Thank you, Bob, for your awesome words and your encouragement 🙂
This week I had a wonderful question sent to me, to ask Amethyst how to let go of childhood wounds. You can see Amethyst’s response by watching the reading below.
[youtube http://youtu.be/mXGGyXLk8w4]If you would like to ask a question, please email me – theamethystangel@hotmail.co.uk and I will get Aria, Amethyst or Velvet to answer it for you.
If you would like to own your own Oracle Card deck, then please visit my website to purchase them. (Scroll down the page to find the purchasing buttons 🙂 )
To test out a new giveaway site – Instafreebie – I have set up a Giveaway for 23 copies of The Doorway to PAM. Click here to claim your free copy – the giveaway will run until the 28th Feb, or until 23 have been claimed. If it goes well, I will hold regular giveaways with my other books too, so keep an eye out for them!
Indie Authors – if you are looking for an easy way to issue free books to reviewers and fans, this could well be the way to do it. Check out their site, they’re very friendly and helpful folk 🙂
Since putting out the call for questions for Aria, Amethyst or Velvet, I have noticed that the majority of the questions are related to Twin Flames. In fact, both of this week’s readings are for two Earth Angels who asked the same question – Will I be with my Twin Flame in this lifetime?
It seems to be a question on the minds of many Earth Angels, and I hope that these two readings not only answer the question for the two who asked, but also for anyone else watching and wondering if they too, will be with their Flame. To know who your Flame is, and not be with them, is a difficult place to be in, I know. Especially if your Flame has not Awakened and does not understand the depth and meaning of your connection.
I write about the reunion of the Flames in my novels – The Earth Angel Training Academy, The Earth Angel Awakening and The Other Side. Though the relationship can be the most harmonious you have ever experienced, the path to being together can be anything but smooth, and it’s important to remember to enjoy the journey, and remember that all is working out exactly as it should.
I hope you enjoy the readings, please feel free to leave a comment, and if you have a question, please email it to me at theamethystangel@hotmail.co.uk.
Was very pleased this week to receive a wonderful review from Patricia D. Eddy, who reviews books for Author Alliance. You can read the review in its entirety on Goodreads here.
If you have read The Elphite, perhaps you would consider taking a few minutes to write a review on Amazon too. It’s amazing how powerful reviews can be, especially for books by an unknown or Indie Author. And I don’t just mean because they encourage readers to buy the books and give the author a chance, but because chances are, the author reads every single review, and not only takes any criticism or advice and works on it, but also uses the positive words of encouragement to keep motivated. I wrote about this in a blog post a little while ago.
So maybe today, seeing as it’s a day of expressing love, you could show an Indie Author some love and write them a review!
Just thought I’d post the latest reading, this one was using the Aria cards. I decided to brave the chilly February breeze and go out into the woods with my wings on (yes, I am a little crazy) to do the reading. It was very windy indeed, so I apologise for the sound problems on the video!! I hope you enjoy it anyway 🙂
[youtube http://youtu.be/InpJmu9-wSs]
Doing the man-brain box experiment last week really did bring up some interesting things, and bring me to some huge revelations about the differences between men and women, and why relationships are the way they are. I’ve spoken to a few friends about the box-brain concept, and they all agree, that this is the way it works. (of course I’m not saying that every single man on earth has boxes in his brain, it is a generalisation, but one that makes sense to me)
I read somewhere (I apologise for not always linking to the source of my information, I read so many articles online during the course of the day, that I often then don’t remember where I read what!) that we live in a patriarchal society that is heavily into separation, dominance and exclusion. It’s the ‘survival of the fittest’ mentality, and the idea of being better than others, or having things that others do not have, that are more male qualities, and those qualities have shaped our current world.
Whereas a very long time ago, society was run by the matriarchs, and was one of inclusion, nurturing, supporting ones another, and understanding that we were all one, we were all equal. I think that though there have been major leaps forward in the last 100 years in terms of rights for women etc., the idea of equality has become skewed. In this male – dominated world, the idea of women and men being equal, is for women to be the same as men. For them to be able to be the breadwinner, to earn as much money, do the same jobs, and do all of these things in a male way. To think in terms of separation, and compartmentalise everything into boxes.
Now, having done this little experiment, I’ve come to realise, that I will never be the same as a man in my thinking. And that there are certain jobs that I just wouldn’t be suited to. And do you know what? That’s okay! Men and women’s brains work differently for good reasons. Mainly, that we weren’t created to do the same things. We weren’t created to think in the same ways. We were designed to fulfill roles that suited our physique, our innate talents and our thinking. Women are able to think of many things all at once, and to multi-task efficiently, so of course it makes sense for them to care for their children, because looking after children requires an awful lot of multi-tasking! There are so many instances where men and women are designed perfectly to fulfill their roles, I don’t think I need to go into any more in detail.
I don’t believe we need to be equal in a patriarchal way. I believe we need to become equal in a matriarchal way. In that all life is precious. No one is above or below anyone else. That there is enough for everyone. And that we appreciate and respect the roles that men and women fulfill – with an equal amount of love and appreciation.
So, as a tool, the boxes are quite useful, even for men (because the current technologies are forcing them to become multi-taskers too) because it helps you to focus, and get more done. But I wouldn’t want to think in this way all of the time, because I like to be able to make cards while watching TV, and I like to listen to music while writing my books, and I like to think of the little things, like writing notes to go under my partner’s pillow, or sending a card to a friend to say hi, or actually getting cards and presents to people on their birthdays, rather than after (though sometimes that doesn’t happen!). And all of those things are very female. My partner has commented more than once how he doesn’t understand how I manage to do so many of these small, thoughtful things. Because he is focused on the larger matters at hand. But I know what a difference those small things make to other people. I know that my readers appreciate it when I take the time to e-mail them back, I know that my friends enjoy the small packages that arrive (sometimes by owl 😉 ) and I know that my partner loves to find little notes and gifts under his pillow for no reason other than because I felt like it.
So I think the lessons I have learnt from this experiment are (for now):
#1. Using the male way of organising boosts productivity (Focusing on one thing at a time gets more things completed), and that while multi-tasking is useful for getting lots of smaller things done, it’s not so useful for larger projects.
#2. Men and women don’t need to be equal in ability, but they need to be appreciated equally for their abilities to do different things.
#3. That women need to cut guys a little slack, and understand that they may forget to get a card or present before the actual day of celebration, because they’re focused on the big things like keeping a roof over their heads and fuel in the car and getting work projects done. And it’s not because they don’t love them, or because they don’t care, but because they just don’t think in the same way.
#4. That I like being a woman, and I wouldn’t want my brain to be full of little boxes, because I like being able to do the little things that usually end up in a box that rarely gets opened in a man’s brain.
#5. That men and women need to learn to love and appreciate themselves, and work to their strengths.
and finally
#6. We are one. What you do for yourself, you do for another. What you do to another, you do to yourself. There is no separation, no one is better than anyone else. We are all connected, but in our individuations, we are unique, and we need to love and appreciate that about ourselves and each other.
Thank you for reading my post today, if you feel you learnt something too, then please feel free to comment below 🙂
Well what an interesting week this has been! On Monday, I posted that I was going to conduct an experiment. The Man-Brain Box Experiment, which came about from watching a video online about how men and women’s brains function differently.
It’s been an eye-opening experiment, I will say that! In order to do it, I created my own boxes, and only allowed myself to have one box open at a time, and only focus on doing one of the things inside the box at a time.
Goodness, was it difficult! Single-tasking really is not something that comes naturally to me… anymore. I do remember when I was a child that I could focus on one thing for hours and hours, whether it was reading or playing with my toys, I could focus with no problems at all. But now? Now I am the uber multi-tasker, with at least ten tabs open on my online browser at any on time (not to mention other software and applications being open at the same time) I juggle talking to several people on Facebook at a time, while talking on the phone and answering e-mails. In any one moment I could be doing three or four things at once.
So to focus on one thing until it was finished? Very, very difficult for me. But do you know what? It was so much more productive! Every day this week I have been able to cross things of my list. Things that I had actually completed and were not half-done as usual. And I even had time to occasionally open the Nothing Box! I found that when I was cooking dinner, I would just be cooking dinner, not trying to chat to people on Facebook and do three other things at the same time (definitely burnt less food this week). And overall, I have noticed that the amount of time I spend on Facebook has dramatically decreased, which is something I had been trying to do for some time, but couldn’t seem to stop myself going on there! A few weeks back, I read an article about how there was so little time to get everything done, the only way forward was to multi-task like crazy. (I cannot find the article now, and indeed, if you Google ‘multi-tasking’ all you will find is articles on why it is bad for you!) But do you know what I discovered? Multi-tasking makes time go past very quickly. And all of a sudden, it’s the end of the day, and though I’ve been busy all day, I havn’t actually achieved anything. Whereas single-tasking has the opposite effect. It slows time down. Especially when I’m focusing purely on a work project. It feels as though hours have passed, but when I look at the clock, it’s only been ten minutes. Therefore, by the end of a single-tasking, man-brain day, I can easily tick off a few things of the list.
Over all, the boxes that were opened most often, (in order, most often opened to least often opened) were –
Work Box
Social Media Box
Personal Box
Relationship Box
Nothing Box
Mission Box
Personal Box
Creativity Box
Domestic Box
So would I do it again? To be honest, I’m thinking of keeping the boxes going for another week, because even just dividing all of the things I need to do into boxes was a calming exercise. Because I didn’t have to keep all of these things in my brain all at the same time, and I certainly didn’t have to worry about what was in the Social Media Box while I had my Work Box open. Also, this system had the added benefit that I would ignore the washing up if the Domestic Box wasn’t open, and as a result, my partner has done a lot more washing up this week than normal. Result!
Another revelation this week (that was confirmed by my partner to be true) that the reason why men aren’t very good with getting cards or presents for birthdays, anniversaries or holidays, and are usually found buying things the day before or on the day itself, is because the box for that particular celebration IS NOT OPEN UNTIL THE ACTUAL DAY! What a realisation this was! I never understood why men just seemed incapable of remembering to send birthday cards or buy presents. It’s something of a relief to know that it’s not because they simply don’t care enough to plan something in advance – it’s just that their brain does not work in a way that allows them to. Also, once you have celebrated something (whether it was on the actual date or not) in the man’s brain, it’s now done. Therefore when I had my birthday party on the 18th, in my partner’s eyes, I had celebrated my birthday, it was over. So when I wanted to go out for the day on my actual birthday, the 20th, it made no sense to my partner. Which would explain why it took him a little while to get into the spirit of it.
What are your thoughts? I know that this week has allowed me to understand men a little better, and to also cut them a little slack, because the way they are is not based on selfishness or being unkind or uncaring, it is just their nature, the way their brains work. It’s also taught me not to ask my partner to do something if it’s completely unrelated to the task his is doing in that moment, because chances are, he won’t remember to do it, because he’s in a different box!
I will write another update next week, let’s see how productive I can be in the next seven days!
Twin Flame Blog 