Apr 14 2014

A Fabulous Weekend!

This weekend I was in Cirencester, taking part in the Wellness Symposium. The British Dowsing Society had a shop there, and there were a few other stands, including Shelly Sishton and myself. In the morning there were various speakers, and in the afternoon there was a choice of workshops. On Saturday, I listened to a couple of the talks and then attended Adrian Incledon-Webber’s workshop in the afternoon. Then on Sunday, after listening to Shelly Sishton’s talk about essences in the morning, I then held my workshop/talk on how to publish independently. It’s the first time I have done a talk of that length (75 mins) but there was so much to pack into it, I could probably have talked for another couple of hours! It was also my first ever stab at doing a powerpoint presentation, which thanks to Scapple, was not only fun to create, but also fun to present! The attendees asked lots of great questions, and gave me a nice round of applause at the end, so all in all, I think it went quite well!

I had a great time chatting to people, and selling books, and made the interesting discovery that the majority of dowsers there were StarPeople! It was also the first time I had given out my shiny new brochure, which was designed by the awesome madappledesigns, to showcase the new structure of my business, The Amethyst Angel. There will be a PDF version of the brochure on my website very soon, but here’s a sneaky peak!

Apr 7 2014

Kindred Spirit Awards

I received an email to ks_awards_2014 day from one of my readers, to say that they had just nominated me for ‘Spiritual Writer’ in the Kindred Spirit Awards. There are 6 awards, and for each category, there is a list of nominees, then a box labelled ‘other’. She entered my name in the ‘other’ box, and suggested that I reach out to my readers and ask them to do the same!

I must admit, when I saw the other names nominated in the category, I felt like it would be silly to even try to compete, but even to just be nominated means a lot to me, and I want to ask you, that if you feel like you have benefited in any way from reading my words, whether its my novels or my blog, then you will vote for me, and bring my work to the awareness of even more people. Because that is why I write, to help as many people as possible.

So, the link to vote is here, on the Kindred Spirit website, and the deadline to vote has been extended to the 30th April. If you feel that my work deserves the award, then please do nominate me, and also vote for the other amazing people and organisations in the other categories too.

Thank you so much, for you love and support, it means a lot to me. And thank you, Helen, for nominating me first!

Mar 21 2014

Wise Words of Buddha

It’s been a quiet week on the blog front as I have been busy editing and also spring cleaning the house. I’ve also been working with the madly talented madappledesigns on the new covers for Heaven Dot Com, The Doorway to PAM and The Elphite, as well as the cover for my new novel, I’m Here.

The title of this post is referring to the quote on my calendar right now, which says -‘ Do not speak – unless it improves on silence.’ And I guess that’s why my blog posts are a little sporadic, because as a rule, I do not post unless I have something to say, that I think is worth saying, and worthy of my readers’ time.

Rocking with my firewalking buddies at last year’s UPW.

So why am I writing this post? Because at this very moment in time, a whole group of my favourite people are at Tony Robbins’ Unleash Your Power, in London. I attended the event last year, and it was amazing. I can honestly say that it changed my perspective on life completely, and made me realise that I could in fact live the life I wanted to live. Walking on fire was one of the scariest things I have ever done (even more so than breaking an arrow with my neck) and it made me feel like anything was possible. Since then I have been doing work I love, full time. I haven’t yet got everything sorted, but I know that I am so very lucky to live in such beautiful surroundings, to have an awesome partner and to be living my life’s purpose.

I have had times where I’ve wanted to give up. When it looked like things weren’t working out, or when the finances start to freak me out. And I would start thinking about what I should do instead. Perhaps I should go and get a job, it might be a boring 9-5, and I might only get minimum wage – but it would be a regular income! Surely that would be better? I’d get stuck in these ruts for sometimes days at a time, where I’d scour the job pages, send out CVs, etc etc. And do you know what? Usually I ended up giving up on that and going back to the task at hand – making a living as an author and a publisher.

It came to my awareness recently that I was never going to make Plan A work, if I was focusing on Plan B. If I truly believed in my Plan A of being a successful author, then I didn’t need a Plan B. Just having a Plan B makes Plan A destined to fail. I remembered these words from a talk that Brad Burton gave at a 4Networking meeting I attended, 18 months ago. He knew that his Plan A was going to work. Even when his family and friends thought he was crazy, even when he suffered setbacks and financial problems. He just knew. And he believed in it. I believe that it was his belief that made it work. His single-minded determination made his business successful. But it wasn’t an easy path for him, and I also believe that anything worth doing, anything worth creating, will require a decent amount of hard work, sweat and tears.

So I have thrown away all Plan B’s. There is no other path for me. My path is to do my writing and publishing, and anything related to it. Normal jobs are no longer on the agenda.

It doesn’t just apply to career, either. When you have a relationship back up plan, then your relationship is destined to fail. If all you can think of is what you will do, where you will go, or how you will cope when the relationship breaks down, then inevitably, it will indeed break down. You have to give 100% of yourself to the relationship you are in, and believe that it is ‘forever’. If you don’t want to do that, then it may be time to leave.

So what is your Plan A? What will it take for you to commit to it? Let me know in the comments 🙂

I hope that this post improved on the silence, if it didn’t, my apologies to you!

Mar 13 2014

Still Planting Seeds…

After I wrote my post this week about sowing seeds, my partner found a TED talk about creating tiny habits, by BJ Fogg. I watched the talk and was laughing at the fact that he compared these tiny habits to planting tiny seeds. (Synchronicities huh?) You can see the talk here:

The interesting part about this talk was the part on motivation, and how tiny habits need very little motivation, which means that people are more likely to do them. And also the idea of using an existing habit as the trigger. One of the reasons I find implementing new habit hard is that I just don’t remember to do them, so this was a very interesting concept to me. Over the last couple of days since watching the video, I have implemented just a few new tiny habits, and so far, it seems to be working. I will see how it goes over the next week or so. In terms of exercise habits, I also like the idea of doing little and often, in that you are less likely to get nasty achy muscles that then puts you off of exercising again the next day.

The other part that I found interesting in the talk was that after doing one of these tiny habits, you celebrate it. So far in the last couple of days, that is the step I seem to forget, as it seems foreign to do a little dance singing ‘I’m awesome’ after merely planking for 10 seconds. But the celebration part is quite important, because it makes us feel like we’ve accomplished something, which means we will do it again, and maybe each time we do it, we expand it a little further. Soon, I will have a regular exercise routine, without even realising it, all just through adding these tiny habits into my daily life.

Are you going to start some tiny habits? If so, I would love to hear your ideas in the comments below 🙂

Mar 10 2014

Note to Self: Stop Time Travelling!

I don’t normally blog twice in one day, but an interesting synchronicity popped up this evening and I felt the need to share it. As I mentioned in my earlier post, I am reading Choose Yourself by James Altucher (and just so you know, I’m not getting paid to endorse or advertise his book, I happened to see it advertised and liked the sound of it, I’m just a reader 🙂 ) Now the book is full of very useful advice, but the part that made me stop reading, was when he suggested that you do exactly what one of the characters in my book does. In his book, James suggest that whenever you think of the past or the future, you are in fact time travelling, and a good way to stop doing that and remain in the present, is to label your thoughts ‘past’ or ‘future’.

Now if you have read my book, a visionary fiction novel called The Elphite, you will know that this exact exercise is what Mrs M does with Ellie. Whenever Ellie references the past or the future, Mrs M labels it and cuts off the conversation. By doing this, she is teaching Ellie present moment awareness. She also teaches her how to release all fears and worries, by getting her to ask herself three questions –

Am I alive? Am I awake? Am I loved?

If the answer to those three questions is yes, then there really is nothing to worry about, because in that moment, which is the only moment that exists, all is well. Lori Lesko read The Elphite, and wrote on her blog how she had found the above exercise to be useful. I really must remind myself to try it out too!

I’m only halfway through Choose Yourself so far and I’ve already found many things that have resonated with me and have inspired me, and I look forward to reading the rest.

Thank you for reading my blog, especially if you have read it twice today! Have a wonderful evening.x

Mar 9 2014

Sow the Seeds

In the last couple of days, I have begun my first foray into growing flowers, herbs and vegetables. In the past, my lack of green fingers has meant that most things that need watering that are left in my care surely die. So the concept of starting with a tiny seed (and in some cases, the seeds were as small as bits of dust) and getting it to grow into something edible, is pretty much beyond anything I have ever attempted before.

Here’s me, looking very glamorous!

While planting the parsley seeds, I started thinking about the part in Louise L Hay’s movie – Heal Your Life, when she talks about affirmations being the seeds to creating the life you want. She said that with seeds you plant them, water them, nurture them and basically, you expect that they will grow. But you don’t dig them up every few days to check to see if they are growing or not, because you will end up killing them off. The key is to just tend to them daily, and you will then be able to harvest and benefit from the crop.

[youtube http://youtu.be/2NiRvwmPDxo?t=4m25s]

Daily routines and habits is something that I struggle with. I find it easy to break a habit, and quite difficult to form one. I can do something every single day for a year, and then stop doing it, and forget all about it. In the past I have given up all sorts of things, with no problem at all. I have given up chocolate for a year or more at a time. Currently, I have not had caffeine for thirteen years, I have not had wheat or gluten for four years, I haven’t eaten meat ever, I avoid sweeteners like the plague, and I rarely eat junk food. (Most of it has wheat in it anyway). So it seems I’m pretty good at quitting stuff. I’ve also quit more jobs in my life than most people ever have in their entire lifetime. I tried to count the jobs I’d had once, and got bored after I’d counted 40. Some of them were short-term anyway, but most of them I quit. For a long time I just figured I had commitment issues, but I think it’s more of a case that I don’t see the point in doing anything I am not passionate about, because then it is not serving myself or others.

Which is why I think I struggle with exercising daily. I really don’t find getting out of breath or having sore muscles to be much fun. Even though I know that in the long-term, it will benefit me. And gardening? I think it’s a case of just not really knowing what I am doing that has put me off in the past. I still don’t really know what I’m doing, to be truthful. But I’m willing to give it a try. Perhaps if I can see these teeny little seeds growing into actual, edible items, it will make it easier for me to find things I can do daily to build my business and increase my readership etc.

What the garden looks like right now:

I’m reading a book at the moment, called Choose Yourself, by James Altucher. In it, he describes having daily practices, and I must admit, at first I was thinking – oh here we go again, yet another suggestion to do something everyday, something that I know I won’t ever do. But then I read the list of 26 things that he does every day. Out of which, he suggests people do a minimum of one thing from that list every day. And I realised that I already do ten of those things every day! Therefore, I have a daily routine. How amazing is that? I had a daily routine and I didn’t even realise it. Which means that I can do things on a daily basis. I plan on printing the list out, and posting it above my desk, so that it inspires me to try doing some of the things I don’t do on a daily basis.

This realisation has made me wonder how many more things there are, that I believe I cannot do, but in fact I can. So perhaps I can be a successful gardener, perhaps I can enjoy running, perhaps I can learn how to play the piano properly, and perhaps I can indeed be successful in doing what I truly love to do. All I need to do is to choose myself. And choose to love and believe in myself. And know that the only limitations in my life are the ones I choose to have. It’s time to let go of my old stories, my old beliefs, my old limitations, and become who I really am.

I choose myself. I choose to be awesome 🙂

Mar 5 2014

Fantasy is My Reality

Yesterday, a friend of mine forwarded me a link to the website of a lady called Dolores Cannon. Dolores is a hypnotherapist, who has spent the last 40 years working with thousands of clients, taking many of them into their past lives. She has written 17 books, which she has written as non-fiction. Her latest book is The Three Waves of Volunteers, and sounds very much like the concept of Earth Angels. The concept that there are beings from other planets, dimensions and realms who have come to Earth to help with the Global Awakening. Just doing a little Googling, I found many comments that she is merely a ‘great science fiction writer’ and that her work is nothing but imagination and fantasy. I have a great respect for anyone who has the courage to stand up and say – this is what I have experienced, this is what I believe, and then putting it out into the world.

It got me thinking about why I prefer to write my books as fiction, even though they are written about topics that are very real to me, and there are situations and events and concepts within them that are very real. I think it’s because I prefer to be able to create freely. Non-fiction books usually have research and facts that need checking and backing up – in fiction, you can do whatever you wish. And as we live in a creative universe, I prefer to be free of these restrictions and write whatever I want. Also, I realised that though I may believe in the truth in my books, I don’t actually need anyone else to believe it. I am more than happy for my readers to looks at my books as fun stories, as interesting concepts and as pure fantasy. I do find, that many readers have found things in my books that resonate with them, and that inspire them to look for more information, and that is where the non-fiction books then come in very useful, because they can look for the texts that back up these new realisations.

A fabulous book I have just finished reading, is Infinite You by Pamala Oslie. I met Pamala in LA last February and attended one of her workshops. I bought her book – Life Colours, because I really resonated with what she said during the workshop. At the end of the workshop, she began telling us about her experience with parallel universes, and for the last year, I have recounted one of her stories to many people. That story is told in Infinite You, and I really would recommend it. Some of the concepts about parallel universes are much like the ideas that came to me back in 2007 when I came up with the concept of choosing your own reality. It was amazing to hear someone else validate these ideas, making me feel like I wasn’t just a little crazy. Choose Your Own Reality is the only non-fiction book I have written, and it’s a very short one, that I wrote in just a day. It contains a very simple method to choosing your own reality. (Choose Your Own Reality is now a bonus book at the end of The Doorway to PAM)

My current novel-in-progress has many real-life incidents and events in it, but I have fictionalised it so that it will be almost impossible to tell which bits actually happened and which parts didn’t. In some ways I have done this to protect the people who inspired the story, (including myself) but mainly it’s because I think books should primarily entertain and inspire people, and being restricted to recounting the truth (or at least, my perception of the truth) may jeopardise that.

So I’d like to do a shout-out to all the brave Earth Angels out there, including Dolores and Pamala, who are standing out from the crowd and who are helping the rest of us to Awaken with their words and their insights. You are truly remarkable beings, and you are doing an awesome job. Thank you.x

Feb 28 2014

Looking for your Twin Flame?

Then be sure to have plenty of aloe vera for when you get burned.

A Twin Flame relationship is like no other union on earth. When in the presence of your Flame you are your true self, you are complete and whole and most of all you are home. Many Earth Angels have a strong longing for their home, whether it’s the Angelic Realm or another planet, but when they are with their Twin Flame, that feeling of not belonging on earth, of being different, or alien on this planet, disappears. And they have found where they belong.

But as harmonious and beautiful and breathtaking as a Twin Flame union is, within the beauty and joy is a darkness. As with everything, there is a duality. It is not all fireworks and fun, and often, when you hold onto your Flame too tightly, like a firework held tightly in your fist, you will get burned. Flames must be free to dance and move around, free to be their own unique selves, while coming together at times too.

Why am I saying this? Mainly it’s because of a song lyric in a popular song that I really like at the moment – Bonfire Heart by James Blunt. The lyric in particular is the following:

Everybody wants a flame, but they don’t want to get burnt.

[youtube http://youtu.be/g1j1qwQQ8-Q]

But unfortunately, in my experience, that’s just not possible. Because though Twin Flames love each other unconditionally, we are humans, in physical bodies, on a physical plane, and it is not always possible to live purely in the metaphysical realm of pure, unconditional love. We have emotions, we have baggage from past relationships, maybe even from past lives when we were together and then lost each other. We have beliefs and ideas we have been brought up with. We are human now, even if we weren’t previously. And we are here to experience everything. The good, the bad, the painful and the joyful.

The difference between the bad times in a Twin Flame relationship and the bad times in any other relationship, is that no matter what, Flames loves each other and want the best for each other, and would never intentionally harm one another. Disagreements and arguments are more likely to be about human baggage, and if both Flames are aware enough, can be discussed and resolved without needing to resort to separation.

I was asked today how it is possible to be with your Flame, and know it for certain, but have your Flame be completely oblivious to the fact. I personally think it comes down to fear. There is an amazing description in a book called ‘Only Love is Real’ by Brian Weiss. The book is about soulmates, Flames, who find each other through different lifetimes. Weiss is a very well-known hypnotist and has written several books on past lives. The first couple of pages of the book was the most poignant to me, and you can read it on the look inside feature on Amazon. I would recommend buying the book and reading the whole thing though, as it demonstrates just how incredible it is that we are able to find our Flames in this age.

As much as the burns can be painful, please do not let the fear of the stinging pain put you off of finding your Flame, or from being reunited, if you already know them. Burns do heal, and the faint scars left behind are just reminders that you were brave enough to allow yourself to be vulnerable, and to love wholly and absolutely. I know that no matter how many scars I may have, I will always be thankful for every moment spent in the arms of my Flame.

Feb 25 2014

A World-Class Success

In January, I met an amazing individual called George Hardwick. I had gone to London for a couple of events, and he was at the first one, which was the Yes Group London meeting. Attracted by the cover of his book, I began talking to him about living life as a creative. He is a spoken-word artist, and one of the first things he’s said to me, was:

“To be successful in your creative missions, you must be world-class in whatever it is you do.”

Now at first, I thought, well jeez, that’s a bit of a tall-order! There are millions of writers in the world, and even if I tried my hardest, I couldn’t imagine being known as a world-class author. It just seemed impossible. I bought his book, The Creative Uprising, because I was intrigued by his message and his ideas, and wanted to know more.

Then at the end of the evening, after listening to two incredible speakers, who indeed both appeared to be world-class in what they did, George took to the stage.

To say I was blown away would be an understatement. He delivered a rap/poem, that encompassed the messages of the two speakers, and the energy of the meeting, and it flowed and rhymed and made us all laugh, gasp and clap. And he had written the entire thing during that evening, while sitting and watching in the audience. He had taken in every word, and then wrote the piece, which summarised the evening in the most poetic and beautiful way.

He was, quite frankly, world-class.

In fact, you can see his ‘wRapping up’ of that evening below. Even if you weren’t there and watched the speakers, you will still get a lot from George’s words.

[youtube http://youtu.be/2BRlg89vuj8]

So how can you become a world-class success? Recently I have been re-reading two books, the first is The Go-Giver, by Bob Burg and John David Mann, and the second is Go-Givers Sell More, by the same authors. The first is a parable, and the second then applies the laws from the story to real life. For anyone who has a phobia of selling, I would highly recommend them. There are five laws described, and the first is the Law of Value, where your true worth is based on how much value you create for others. As they say in the second book, creating value for others does not necessarily need to cost any money. You create value every time you take the time to thank someone, greet someone or call someone to say hello. In business, you create value when you send a handwritten thank you note or in fact do anything where you are putting the needs and desires of your customer above your own.

This is what I think it means to be world-class. George says in his book that we often link success to how much money or stuff we have acquired, but that it doesn’t necessarily mean anything. And that it is more important to be successful in helping others and changing people’s lives for the better, by giving our gift. A while back, fed up with being asked how many books I had sold, because to most people, that is how you measure the success of an author, I wrote the following quote on my Facebook wall:

“Do not ask an author how many books she has sold. Instead, ask her how many lives she has touched.”

To me, I write to help people. I don’t write to see how much money I can make, because that is not how I measure success. The main reason I would like to sell more books, is so that I can help more people. And I am coming to realise that I need to step up my game. I know that I have published books before they are ready, and I have not given my all to making sure they are as awesome as I can make them before I release them into the world. This is due to impatience and an attitude of ‘It will do’. But no more. I will still set myself deadlines, because I know full well that without them, I will never publish anything, but I am making a commitment to myself that my next book is as amazing as I can possibly make it before I publish it.

Oddly enough, when it comes to projects I do for other people, I will work my ass off to make sure it’s as perfect as possible, before the author publishes it. It seems I have no problems with working really hard for other people on their projects, but when it comes to my own, I am more slack. I suppose I fear disappointing others more than I fear disappointing myself, but I need to change that feeling into the driving desire to be world-class in every sense.

As the saying goes – ‘How you do anything is how you do everything.’ And I am beginning to think that in order to be successful in life, and not just in our creative missions or business, we must be world-class in EVERYTHING that we do, every day.

What do you think?

P.S. After having a conversation with Bob Burg on Twitter, I would like to add to this post that it isn’t a case of EITHER creating value for others OR making money, it is more of a case that by putting your FOCUS on creating value for others, then making money will be the result. I know I have had difficulty with the idea of being paid to help others or for doing something I love, but I am working on those old beliefs.

Thank you, Bob, for your awesome words and your encouragement 🙂

Feb 10 2014

We Are One

Doing the man-brain box experiment last week really did bring up some interesting things, and bring me to some huge revelations about the differences between men and women, and why relationships are the way they are. I’ve spoken to a few friends about the box-brain concept, and they all agree, that this is the way it works. (of course I’m not saying that every single man on earth has boxes in his brain, it is a generalisation, but one that makes sense to me)

I read somewhere (I apologise for not always linking to the source of my information, I read so many articles online during the course of the day, that I often then don’t remember where I read what!) that we live in a patriarchal society that is heavily into separation, dominance and exclusion. It’s the ‘survival of the fittest’ mentality, and the idea of being better than others, or having things that others do not have, that are more male qualities, and those qualities have shaped our current world.

Whereas a very long time ago, society was run by the matriarchs, and was one of inclusion, nurturing, supporting ones another, and understanding that we were all one, we were all equal. I think that though there have been major leaps forward in the last 100 years in terms of rights for women etc., the idea of equality has become skewed. In this male – dominated world, the idea of women and men being equal, is for women to be the same as men. For them to be able to be the breadwinner, to earn as much money, do the same jobs, and do all of these things in a male way. To think in terms of separation, and compartmentalise everything into boxes.

Now, having done this little experiment, I’ve come to realise, that I will never be the same as a man in my thinking. And that there are certain jobs that I just wouldn’t be suited to. And do you know what? That’s okay! Men and women’s brains work differently for good reasons. Mainly, that we weren’t created to do the same things. We weren’t created to think in the same ways. We were designed to fulfill roles that suited our physique, our innate talents and our thinking. Women are able to think of many things all at once, and to multi-task efficiently, so of course it makes sense for them to care for their children, because looking after children requires an awful lot of multi-tasking! There are so many instances where men and women are designed perfectly to fulfill their roles, I don’t think I need to go into any more in detail.

I don’t believe we need to be equal in a patriarchal way. I believe we need to become equal in a matriarchal way. In that all life is precious. No one is above or below anyone else. That there is enough for everyone. And that we appreciate and respect the roles that men and women fulfill – with an equal amount of love and appreciation.

So, as a tool, the boxes are quite useful, even for men (because the current technologies are forcing them to become multi-taskers too) because it helps you to focus, and get more done. But I wouldn’t want to think in this way all of the time, because I like to be able to make cards while watching TV, and I like to listen to music while writing my books, and I like to think of the little things, like writing notes to go under my partner’s pillow, or sending a card to a friend to say hi, or actually getting cards and presents to people on their birthdays, rather than after (though sometimes that doesn’t happen!). And all of those things are very female. My partner has commented more than once how he doesn’t understand how I manage to do so many of these small, thoughtful things. Because he is focused on the larger matters at hand. But I know what a difference those small things make to other people. I know that my readers appreciate it when I take the time to e-mail them back, I know that my friends enjoy the small packages that arrive (sometimes by owl 😉 ) and I know that my partner loves to find little notes and gifts under his pillow for no reason other than because I felt like it.

So I think the lessons I have learnt from this experiment are (for now):

#1. Using the male way of organising boosts productivity (Focusing on one thing at a time gets more things completed), and that while multi-tasking is useful for getting lots of smaller things done, it’s not so useful for larger projects.

#2. Men and women don’t need to be equal in ability, but they need to be appreciated equally for their abilities to do different things.

#3. That women need to cut guys a little slack, and understand that they may forget to get a card or present before the actual day of celebration, because they’re focused on the big things like keeping a roof over their heads and fuel in the car and getting work projects done. And it’s not because they don’t love them, or because they don’t care, but because they just don’t think in the same way.

#4. That I like being a woman, and I wouldn’t want my brain to be full of little boxes, because I like being able to do the little things that usually end up in a box that rarely gets opened in a man’s brain.

#5. That men and women need to learn to love and appreciate themselves, and work to their strengths.

and finally

#6. We are one. What you do for yourself, you do for another. What you do to another, you do to yourself. There is no separation, no one is better than anyone else. We are all connected, but in our individuations, we are unique, and we need to love and appreciate that about ourselves and each other.

Thank you for reading my post today, if you feel you learnt something too, then please feel free to comment below 🙂