Sep 14 2016

What’s the Story?

Morning glory?

What is your story? What do you tell other and yourself every day about you? What do you say you can do? You can’t do? What do you say you hate? Who do you say you hate? What are your most repetitive thoughts about your faults, your limitations, your imperfections?

Write them all down. Then look at them.

Are any of them actually true? Or are they just stories?

I have always told the story that I am not a morning person. Always. Hate the mornings. Only time I don’t mind is when camping, and that’s only usually because the sunrises are amazing, and it’s too hot in the tent, and I need air.

Other than that – NOT a morning person. AT ALL.

I always feel fuzzy headed if I get up early. I feel more tired. I never get things done early in the morning.

All just stories. All lies too.

I started working in a normal job this week, needs must and all. And on the first day, I was sat in traffic for 30 mins. It was so boring! I thought to myself – if I left earlier, I would miss the traffic, and get to work in plenty of time to do something I want to do before I start.

So for the last two days, I have been getting up at 6am. Leaving the house at 7am, missing all the traffic, seeing the most beautiful sunrises, and then getting to work with and hour and a half to do what I want. In that time, I have edited a chapter and a half of audio book. Then I have been working, getting home by 5, eating, watching TV to chill out, then watching my awesome friend, George Hardwick on FB live, writing a blog post, catching up with friends, making my lunch for the next day, and getting into bed by 10.30pm.

I have never felt more awake and productive and energetic.

I have changed my story. I am a morning person. I am more productive when I get up early. I can get my own stuff done and work 9 to 5.

Being a morning person is not genetic, it’s a story. It’s a programmed, conditioned thought. And I have changed it. I am reprogramming myself. I am really enjoying my early mornings, my tea in my travel mug. and getting the audio editing done (creating the audio book is another thing I thought I would hate doing, and resisted for ages. I’m really enjoying it!)

So what are your stories? What would you like to change? Think about it. Write it down. Then rip it up and write a new story.

Tea & Editing at 7.30am

Sep 13 2016

Time to Feel

When we go through painful situations, we often will do anything not to feel the pain. Not to experience the hurt. Not to feel the embarrassment, sadness, grief, anger etc. So we block it out. With alcohol, or Facebook, or books or movies or actually running away to somewhere else.

When we desperately want something or someone who we know is toxic for us, whether it’s a person or a cigarette, we find that we don’t have the will power to stop ourselves from picking up the phone or the lighter, because we can’t bear to feel what we are feeling. We can’t bear to crave something. We can’t bear to miss someone. We can’t bear the longing and the heartbreak and the desperation.

But what if we just felt it? What if we just dove into those feelings and really allowed them to be? Perhaps we would break the addiction. Break the cycle. And release the feelings.

It’s hard to do that when we have spent so many years avoiding it. But it’s time. Time to stop running away from our feelings and running towards the drama; instead go deeply into the feelings and feel them, acknowledge them, accept them.

Once you have done that, you can move on. You will no longer be running away. You will be moving toward your joy. Toward things that are healthy. Towards your dreams.

Of course, I’m not saying to stop using Facebook, or watching movies or reading books. But I am saying that when you do those things, do them because you enjoy them. Not because you’re using them to escape your feelings.

You might find that the feelings you’ve been avoiding really aren’t the monsters you’ve made them out to be.

Sending you love, you are strong. You are beautiful. You can create a life that you don’t need to escape from. I believe in you.

Sep 12 2016

All About Twin Flames

I was looking through my summaries the other day, and I realised that my most popular posts are about Twin Flames, which isn’t surprising, I guess, it’s a topic that many want to know more about. So I thought it might be an idea to list links to my most popular posts on Twin Flames here, for easy reference.

Twin Flame Relationships

Dear Twin Flames

Why Twin Flames are Reuniting

Twin Flame Oracle Readings

The Reunion of the Flames

The Twin Flame Reunion

Time to Walk Away

Twin Flame Separation

Also, here are my most popular videos on Twin Flames:

Sending love out to all the Twin Flames, whether they are together, apart, or have yet to find each other yet. xxx

Sep 11 2016

Let It Go!

I know you just started singing the song from Frozen…. hehe

But honestly, it’s time to let go. Of the old stories, of the past, of the pain, of the grief, of everything that is stopping you from shining and loving and enjoying your life! I have discovered recently, much to my utter embarrassment, that I am a total Drama Llama! I love the drama! I love the stories! The dramatic, tragic, terrible stories are the best for retelling over and over! And I have so many! (yes there is an overuse of exclamation marks already, it’s the Drama Llama in me, sorry)

Let go.

It’s my main message to myself and to my friends right now. Let of having to control everything. Of having to be perfect, of having to do everything right, of having to please everyone. Of being a Drama Llama!

Let go.

We are choosing to hold on, to repeat old patterns, to remain stuck.

Let go.

Time to create new patterns, new neural pathways (yup getting fancy now) new habits and a new way of life.

This is a short post, because really, there’s only so many times you can repeat ‘Let go’ before it gets annoying. So I will leave you with this quote photo, the quote is from my upcoming book, the 7th one in the Earth Angel Series, which is due out this winter!

Sep 10 2016

Underwhelmed and Overwhelmed

I have so many blog posts I want to write. I have a huge list of books I want to write. I have craft projects I desperately want to dive into. I have online classes to create. I have books I want to read, movies I want to see, projects I want to work on, friends I want to visit, places I want to explore, and so much I want to discover.

It’s overwhelming. Just my to-do list alone is a mind map of madness. Just picking one thing and getting it done is difficult. The only reason I’m getting this blog post written is because it’s nearly midnight and I’m doing the 30 day blog challenge and I want to win it! But otherwise, choosing a task, then seeing it through, is overwhelming. What to choose first? I often ending up choosing the easy stuff, the fun stuff, but that doesn’t always really get me anywhere.

While visiting New York City this summer on my book tour, we saw a lot of awesome street art, but though this was one of the simplest ones, it struck a chord:

Right now, that is exactly where I am. As overwhelmed as I am with what I want to do, I am equally as underwhelmed with the motivation to do it! It’s not because I’m not doing things I love, because I am. It’s not because I don’t want to do these things, because I do. But sometimes, I just want to stay in bed and do absolutely nothing, because I haven’t got the oomph to give anything my all. But despite being an adult who could actually stay in bed all day and no one would tell me off or tell me I couldn’t, I instead get up and keep going, keep chipping away at the endless to-do list, and getting stuff done.

But sometimes, a period of non-action and non-doing is exactly what is needed. To retreat from the world, go within, and have a deep rest. Without feeling guilty or lazy!

I often wait until I am ill or injured before I allow myself to chill out and relax, and it’s quite ridiculous. In fact, I trapped a nerve in my back yesterday, and was in a lot of pain. Did I stop? Nope! It’s been better today, but incredibly sore, but I still haven’t stopped. Even with little motivation to get things done, I haven’t stopped.

I have no idea what the point of this blog post is, not really sure where I got the idea that every blog post had to have a point, actually. I guess I just wanted to say, if you feel overwhelmed by everything you need to do, and underwhelmed with the motivation to do it – you’re not alone. Cut yourself some slack. If you want to stay in bed for a day, go ahead and do it! Don’t wait until you’re hurting or ill to allow yourself to rest.

On that note, time to sleep.

Sep 9 2016

Enjoy Every Day

Today did not go at all the way I expected it to.

It was a million times more interesting, fun and happy!

I had some boring things on my list to get done, which involved a trip into Cardiff. Once those things were taken care of, I decided to buy some snacks and bottles of water to give out to a few homeless people, in the hopes it might brighten their day a little. Then I went to check out the awesome graphics in St David’s Shopping Centre that my very talented sister, Liz, created.

When I got back, I heard that an old friend needed some photos taken at her concert this evening, and so instead of staring at my laptop all evening, I decided to go and take some pictures and videos. I was blown away by the music, she really had put a lot of energy into organising the concert, and was not only conducting the choir and orchestra, but was also playing the harp for several numbers as well! I was really impressed with her confidence and her talent, and was really glad that I went along! A school friend was also in the orchestra, and it was great to see her after so many years!

After the concert, I got some chips and drove down to a beach I spent a lot of time on as a teenager. I sat and ate in the car, then went outside, and stood in the full force of the sea breeze. It felt like I let everything go in that moment, and opened the door to a fresh start, a new beginning.

Today was filled with lots of little magical moments, funny moments, awe-inspiring moments, and beautiful moments. And I realised that every single day could be this way, if I just go with the flow, stay open to last-minute plans, take every opportunity to help others in any way I can, and simply enjoy myself.

In numerological terms, today’s date is 9.9.9. And with 9 being a number of completion, it feels as though it is the perfect day to say good-bye to old ways, old habits, old thinking and an old life. Tomorrow, is a brand new adventure. And I intend to enjoy every moment of it.

Sep 8 2016

Famous Banana Pancake Recipe

I warned you I would start posting recipes, didn’t I? Well, this is a special recipe, because I’m quite famous for it! It’s ludicrously simple and incredibly yummy, and is gluten-free and vegan too!

To make it a tiny bit more interesting, I have done it as a photo recipe. Enjoy! (let me know if you try it and love it!) It make about 3 small pancakes. I have a tiny one-egg frying pan which is perfect 🙂

Ingredients! (Choc spread optional, leave it out to make vegan, obviously)

Mash the banana with a fork

Until it looks like this

Add some gluten-free self-raising flour (or normal flour if you’re weird)

Mash the flour into the banana

Keep adding flour and mashing it in until the mixture is so thick the fork stands up (or you get bored of mashing)

Keep adding flour and mashing it in until the mixture is so thick the fork stands up (or you get bored with mashing)

Add some water (this was too much water, add a small amount at a time)

Mixey mash the water in until it looks lumpy and runny like this.

Put some coconut oil in the pan and let it heat up a bit

Pour some mixture in and cook on very low heat until it starts bubbling then flip it (if you have done a very thick one, then you may need to flip it while it’s still runny on the top)

mmmmmm

Add favourite toppings, then consume.

You’re welcome! Oh and if you want to make enough for friends, simply add more bananas and more flour and more water. Yeah, it’s that scientific… you could add chocolate powder to the mix too…

Sep 7 2016

The Art of Procrastination

Obviously, this blog post is inspired by the fact that I have been procrastinating on writing this post today. It’s 11.10pm, and though I have seen a friend, run a few errands and done a few bits of work, I have been avoiding writing my blog. Not for a lack of topics (I still have so much to write about the tour, and a whole host of other random things lined up) but for the lack of flow.

What do I mean by that? I mean that when I write, I need to be in the flow, and allow the words to come through me. When I think too much about what to write or how to word something, it just doesn’t work. It feels like I’m fighting with the white page to put marks on it that make sense.

When I’m in the flow, I can knock out a blog post in less than 20 mins. When I’m in the flow I’ve even been known to write a novel in two weeks. But today, has been a no flow. In fact, this has taken me 20 minutes to write so far, because I have been watching the last but one Harry Potter movie instead of concentrating.

So is it better to force the creativity when it isn’t flowing freely? Or is it better to procrastinate and do something else? There are so many schools of thought on this. Some say that you have to be disciplined, and write, or create, or practice every day, regardless of whether you want to or feel inspired. And there are others that say to only create when you feel the urge, the pull the passionate inspiration to.

I’m more in the latter group, usually, but interestingly, even when I force myself to write something, or make myself stick to a schedule, then sometimes, magic does actually happen, even when I’m not in the mood. The only reason I am writing this, even though I don’t feel like it’s flowing, is because I accepted the challenge of writing a blog post a day for 30 days, and I don’t want to let down my friend, Tiffany, who is doing the challenge with me.

But perhaps, someone will read this ramble and realise that they too, only create when in the flow, and that it’s perfectly fine to be that way. But also, it’s good to push ourselves to do things we wouldn’t normally do, because something magical might become of it.

I’m going to stop there, just in case this really is boring. If it is, I apologise, but this is what happens when I’m not in the flow. Next time, I’ll post a recipe! I posted a few recipes during my last 30 day blog challenge, and madly enough, they were the most popular posts! It’s a funny old world…

I was trying to add words to this image, to illustrate the flowing words versus the forced words, and couldn’t come up with anything, so I have just posted the picture instead… apologies for the lack of inspiration today, hope to be back on form tomorrow!

Sep 6 2016

I Hate Learning

I was wasting time in WHSmith the other day, before catching a train, and after perusing the book section (must admit, I look mainly to see what’s is popular on the covers, sad, I know) I moved onto the magazine rack. I saw lots of magazines on cameras, and there was one specifically for Nikon, to teach you how to use your DSLR properly. I thought to myself – that would be a good idea, I would like to know how to use it properly, not just fiddle about with the settings until it looks about right.

Then immediately after that thought, came another one that went along the lines of – How boring to learn how to use my camera from a magazine.

The thought made me stop for a moment, and I realised that yes, if I had bought the magazine, I would probably never read it, and it wouldn’t help me use my camera better. Because actually, I hate learning.

I hated school. I hated reading books of facts or history or data. I tried to go to university. Twice. I hated it. I hate reading lengthy articles, and the only non-fiction I read is generally self-help or spiritual or metaphysical, and even then, if it’s a bit dry or dull, I won’t finish it.

I have been trying for some time to find a course I could do to qualify in something that would give me a job or career that paid well, so I could keep doing my books but not expect the royalties to support me. But there was nothing I could think of, nothing that I could find that I knew I could stick to.

I hate learning.

However, I love discovering.

I love reading stories, novels or blogs that inspire, inform and teach me something – without trying to. I love discovering some new random fact or bit of history that I didn’t know before.

I love to discover new things from movies and TV shows, obviously, much of history in movies is skewed, but that’s okay, I still discover things.

I love to discover new information from talking to friends, from watching TED talks, from being shown how to do something, or being given random advice by a stranger.

It might seem like a bit of a pointless thing to do, to make this definition between learning and discovering, after all, they’re essentially the same thing, but for me, it has been a complete eye-opener. Knowing that I would rather discover something for myself, even if I make mistakes while doing so, rather than being shown or have to read a manual to learn – is a huge realisation for me.

I can stop looking for courses now. I can stop pretending I will ever get a boring qualification to do something sensible. Instead, I will seek new opportunities to discover new things, try new things, and allow myself to play and figure things out. I plan to visit a friend who is an awesome photographer, to get some tips on using my camera better, and how to get specific shots I really want to get.

What about you? Do you love to learn? Or would you rather discover?

Sep 5 2016

Where Do Our Ambitions Come From?

This post wasn’t on my list to write, but I just had a realisation about twenty minutes ago, which I needed to write about.

Do you know where your ambitions came from? Do you know why you wanted to do the work you do? Have the relationships you have? Why you love some things and hate others? Most people would say that our conditioning and programming comes mostly from our family and from teachers and friends who are around us when we’re growing up. That’s why we end up dating replicas of our parents, because it’s what we know.

Well I just realised that my desire to have my own business, and my love of stationery and packing up goods into boxes and sending them out, came from a movie.

Yes, that’s right. A movie. And they say that media doesn’t have that much impact on us? The movie was my favourite, I have no idea how many times I watched it, but I know it was many times. It was called Baby Boom. It was about a high-powered business woman who ends up with a baby girl after her cousin dies, and who ends up leaving her job in New York and moving to Vermont, where she ends up starting her own baby food business.

Thinking about it, that may have been the beginning of my love of New York and New England too…

Anyway, my favourite parts of the movie were when her business is taking off and she is sending out jars of the baby food in brown boxes with the custom Country Baby label on them. I remember being fascinated by the idea of running a business, and I remember wanting to do that myself.

Now of course, I may have still wanted to do that, whether I had watched that movie or not, but it makes you wonder if it wasn’t that movie that planted the seed in my mind.

Was my interest in aliens and ghosts started by watching Ghostbusters, Beetlejuice, ET and Ghost? Was my love of fantasy and sci-fi started by watching the Goonies, the Neverending Story, Hook or Back to the Future? Was it all the many movies I watched set in America that created my love of the US and created my desire to visit there and even live there?

I have no way of knowing the answers to those questions, but it does make you wonder how much of our lives are shaped by the media that we consume at a young age, and it makes me wonder how kids now will turn out in years to come, with the sheer volume of media they are exposed to. A few 80s and 90s movies are nothing compared to the movies, TV shows, games and YouTube videos that are available to watch now.

Just something to ponder, I didn’t have any conclusion to make from this realisation, I just wanted to share it! And if you’re wondering why I suddenly has this realisation, it’s because Baby Boom is currently on Netflix!